So yesterday I had asked what you guys are planning to do/have done when it came to having family around right after the baby arrives. My mom lives 3 hours away at the coast. My MIL lives only 20 minutes away. MIL is chill and laid-back and even if she's chomping at the bit to be super-involved in BB's life, she doesn't make it known the way OMG my mom does haha. This is the first grandchild for everyone so it's a big, big deal.
Anyway, my mom I think had planned to come home with us from the hospital and stay at least a week to help out...which, initially, I was ok with. But as time has gone on, I have come to think a lot on it and I'm just not sure.
So...in order to not have shiz hit the fan later on...I sent an email to mom last night...
Been talking with other moms and with Ryan and just starting to think about what will happen once BB finally arrives. Ryan and I think it'd be good to be just he, me and the baby for the first two weeks (we'd love to have you at the hospital of course when things actually happen)...and then once Ryan goes back to work (week 3), would love for you (and dad if he wants haha) to come stay for a week.
I just think even though it'll be tiring and crazy, that it's important for us to have that time getting to know our new addition y'know? Some good bonding time. Just thinking ahead.
But then again I may call you after our first night at home on our own and beg you to come up then haha...but can we play it by ear? See how things go?
She replied better than I expected actually...
Of course we will respect whatever you and Ryan want and will be there when needed or "if" needed. I did have a small crib in our room when you were born so I could just raise my head and see you any time day or night. After about three days, with no sleep for either of us, we put you next door in your own room. It was so cute. When you would wake up, Dad, me, Chad (older brother) and Mimmie (her mom) would show up in your room. However, mother did a fantastic job giving you a bath and washing your head from the beginning.
This article below sort of says it all. You and he have to be the judge of what you need and I guarantee you will not know that until the time comes.
Knowing What Kind of Help You Need
http://www.nwitimes.com/niche/yourfamily/family-life/new-moms-how-much-help-will-you-need/article_98a5ef33-c346-53db-8d70-70ae0a54fc10.html
Thoughts?
I personally agree with you!!! I did all myself with no help...and even tho it's hard it made me strong and in control! I wouldn't change at all...you need to prove to yourself first that you got this!! Good luck and enjoy:-) ---Gisela---
ReplyDeleteThanks Gi! I know I won't know how it is til he's really HERE...but I like to think we could handle it. Only time will tell!
ReplyDeleteMy mom stayed with Alisha before and after Dylan's birth. Alisha said she doesn't know how she could have done it without her. She's been a mom so she knows how to handle things. Alisha had extenuating circumstances surrounding her emergency c-section and then the spinal fluid leaking after the epidural and preeclampsia after he was born. I would say keep an open mind so you are disappointed IF you feel like you need her right after he's born. You will be a great mom either way! :-)
ReplyDeleteUmm...that was supposed to be AREN'T disappointed! Oops
ReplyDeleteThanks...and yeah I really just wanted to prepare her for IF we end up wanting to go it more alone at the get-go...but I have a feeling I'm gonna want her there :)
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